When Her Juices Are Overflowing but You’re too Dumb to Dive in
Everyone have stories of missed opportunities with the opposite sex. Few dare share them. Let’s change that. You learn more from analyzing failure than success. Share your worst #Muffailures in the comment section
5. Wet Brazilian Student (22)
Back when I was a University lecturer, I rocked up to work one morning only to to see a Brazilian girl waiting in my office. She wore dark red lipstick, a skirt and a push up bra. I sat down behind my desk and asked what she was doing there? She proceeded to hand me a letter drenched in perfume and sprinkled with glitter. It relayed the story of how we were just two random people who’d met in this big lonely world. I said thank you and eagerly awaited where she was going with this. Suddenly she lent forward exposing the top half of her breasts. With a big sensual smile and what could’ve been a perfect voiceover for Marilyn Monroe’s Mr. President speech, she said:
I just want you to know I will do anything, and I DO MEAN AAANYTHING, for you!
After a catwalk worthy 180 spin up from the chair she slowly retreated out of my office. In the coming days she wrote several e-mails professing her undying affection for me. She was begging to get broken in.
In hindsight it was a royal f*ck up not acquiescing. I vividly remember never really even entertaining the thought. In the end I drove her away by telling her how inappropriate her behavior was. Of course her supposed undying affection now turned into blind hatred. She never spoke to me or even walked past me in the hallways again.